Well I haven't blogged in awhile, but I want to start again..my journal is running out of paper lol.
Well I have been threw quite a bit this past month or so...I can say now that its making me stronger, but a few weeks ago I would have laughed in the face of anyone who would tell me it gets better. I was stuck in a deep dark well with now way out and no sign of any light to be seen. I'm not out of that well, Im being pulled back in whenever I get to were I can see some light again. I have alot have to work on with myself, and I know its going to be a long time before I can get to the point of being really alright, now im just glad if I make it threw the day without getting depressed. While I was gone I met alot af great people and alot of shitty people, but thats life. The ladies that I did meet and got close with I wont ever forget. They encouraged me in their own little ways.
I can honestly say that their is one person that sticks out from everyone else. Lindsey Blair, she opened my eyes and brought me back to reality. Having someone tell you to stop being a "selfish bitch" when your on the verge of killing yourself, well for me I was shocked and scared...no one had ever said that to me and Im so glad she did. It really shows me how much she cares, to be that honest and tell me how it is, it means alot to me.
I'am doing better than the last times I was away, and im pretty confident that im going to defeat my demons this time around. Though I still have my days where my thoughts over come me.
ill add more when i have time.
No comments:
Post a Comment