numb

Caught in a whirlpool of presant words and past memories
They all remind me of my nightmares
I feel raped and torn
The best parts of me abused and used
Now I can't take it
Tell me all the lies I once belived was the truth
Now rub it in my face and expect me to forgive you
I don't know what I feel anymore, about anything
I feel like im going down a landslide
And now I can't reach my safety cord

I can't feel anything anymore
I want someone to help me feel the things that are real
I don't want to be a abused
I don't want my kindness to be used
Im as vulnerable as a newborn child

No more will I let people tear me down
Im done letting people in, until they show me THEY are worth it
Try to convince me that you'll be true
All I want is to beable to trust again..
I want to be with that one person who wont let me go
Who will hold my hand and never let me fall
I thought I had it all till I got slapped in the face

Reach for my hand and pull me into your arms
I want to feel safe
I want to feel unconditional love
I want my fairytail I never got
Wishful thinking is all Im made of
You don't always get what you want
But it's not what I want..Its what I need

jdkfjdljklsd

fuck...I cant even write all that im feeling right now, I want to crawl under a rock and never come out.

Im done with the human race, it sucks.